In the name of the greater good, I choose a pen name and share my story

IF

I worked in a lab, I’d be excited to share the results of my latest research project. As it is, I’m just a mother in the trenches, and I’m somewhat embarrassed to share my story, which is a confession of sorts. But you might want to file this story in your parenting notebook. So in the name of the greater good, I choose a pen name and share my story.

This story has all the elements of a perfect experiment: two nearly identical episodes with the same child in the same week. The only difference was my reaction. And now for the research question: How did my reaction influence the outcome of each incident?

Exhibit A — Sunday night. Ten-year-old daughter needed a haircut. This daughter has thick, curly hair that must be kept in a ponytail at all times, so giving her a haircut is a pretty easy chore to forget about — it’s not like she was ever going to wear it down. But even her pony was getting hard to ignore; she needed a haircut. I knew it, she knew it, and sheesh, even the school knew it. After getting a phone call from the tzniyus police, it was time to dig out the scissors.